Hunter Burgan

What's in a picture? A story? A conversation, perhaps? A cassette single of Van Halen's "Panama"? If the latter is true, then I'm getting ripped off! I get sent thousands of pictures every week and all I ever get is "Hot for Teacher"! Maybe next week... Until then, I'm going to stick with what I know: picture analysis. I can find the hidden meaning in almost any picture. If you don't believe me, believe me, you are wrong. If you believe me, you're wrong.



X-Pattz? X-Stew?
Hmmm...I wonder who these two actor types are. I can't see their eyes, but the rest of their heads look a lot like the heads that rest on the necks of my favorite Twilighters, R-Pattz and K-Stew. Even their subtly back-lit hair and lovers' embrace is extremely reminiscent of good ol' Bob and Kris. However, it can't be Robsten-Pattiwart (ouch! really?). I know those two too well to be fooled by this picture. I know for a fact that neither of them would ever be caught with a poorly photoshopped bong. So let's just call them X-Pattz and X-Stew...just two anonymous prom-goers with a poorly photoshopped bong and new wave sunglasses.

Oh...and who the hell is Mr. Ginger?!?



Dr. Philociraptor Ph.D.
It's interesting to me that the Philociraptor's head and claw would be musing this of all philosophical questions. This folly seems beneath his intellect. I hold Phil in a much higher regard. I always assumed he was pondering something like the futility of the pursuit of intrinsic or extrinsic meaning in the universe, or even postulating that the nature of reality as related to a given consciousness is subjective and entirely dependent on that given consciousness. I would even be happy knowing that Phil was just deciding which appetizer to order before the filet of Robert Muldoon. The soup perhaps? The very last thing I would ever imagine Phil contemplating is an LOTR based meme. Really, Phil?? That's so anachronistic of you.

Check back each week for more analytical ephemera. If you have suggestions of photos you would like me to analyze, email them to yourself and Bcc me. If you didn't read last week's Analyze This, you missed a classic. It was part moonchild, part tiger...and ALL beast. If you missed any of the prior weeks, you can travel back in time by looking in my journal section. Why not take a few minutes to read every single one? Lastly, commentary is accepted and expected, Mr. Ginger!